Blowmetheus

Hollywood has gotten fat, lazy and super stupid.  The American public is in lockstep with the dumbing down of the deep space genre that was legitimized by the likes of Stanley Kubrick (2001: A Space Odyssey), and perpetuated by none other than Ridley Scott (Alien) himself.  

Though I did not completely despise Prometheus, my problems with the film are aplenty.  I caught the midnight premiere of the much anticipated and long awaited nerd-a-thon, with my trusty 3D goggles in tow.  This film marks Ridley Scott's "triumphant" return to the dorktastic Sci-Fi genre, though a triumph it is not.  After watching this movie, I get the feeling that Scott jumped back into the space game because it was a sure thing regarding revenue, and not because he was passionate about the project.

(Paging George Lucas!)

The movie opens magnificently with a humanoid alien "Engineer," who looks much like an ancient Greek or Roman statue, standing atop a waterfall on primordial Earth.  He sacrifices himself in order to seed our planet with the molecular ingredients for life. I immediately saw this as a religious ceremony, as in; "Oh, I get it, they created us, so they are the gods of man, but who do they worship?"  I thought this was a great concept and hasn't really been represented in a major hollywood film before. (Well not since Zemeckis' adapation of Sagan's Contact anyway...)  

What I LOVE are the overarching themes, such as the creation and eventual (self)destruction of mankind.  The literal Prometheus allusion being that once man is given the privilege of fire, he is unworthy of its power.  This, I think, is the string that connects all of these movies together in that the pursuit of obtaining the unobtainable will forever tantalize humanity and all its hubris.  

The film goes right in its absolutely awe inspiring spectacle and there are quite a few redeemable elements.  One of which being Michael Fassbender's uncanny portrayal of David 8, a synthetic human developed by the Weyland corporation.  For his Peter O'Toole invoking performance alone, the movie is worth seeing. But sadly, breathtaking CGI and a single actor's talents, does not a movie make.   

There is a great parallel between Weyland Corp. and the Alien Engineers in their mutual terraforming pursuits.  Weyland Corp. creates synthetic humans, the Engineers create human beings.  Who created the Engineers?  It's a fun dynamic that is looped and played around with as David is aware of his creators, while we are in search of ours.  I also like the speculation that Theron's character may in fact be an android herself, but it just so happens that she's David's human sister; hence their rivalry.  Well played.

Noomi Rapace plays, Elizabeth Shaw, the scientist who discovers where the engineer aliens have been hanging out.  She kinda looks like a stubby, baby version of Sigourney Weaver.  Her performance is okay, and kudos to her for managing to get the alien surgically removed from her womb on her own.  (Which, by the way, is a bit of a plot hole in that NOBODY tries to stop her, after she just ran away from 1 and a half people who were emphatically trying to stop her!) It's a very memorable scene, which showcases an automated surgery phone booth, but is blatantly telegraphed earlier in the movie when they essentially say "Hey, what is that surgery machine doing on board?!  Um, never mind that now, we'll get to that scene later."  Her baby alien squid wasn't all that scary, though it ultimately manages to grow to the size of the room it's trapped in without consuming any biomass whatsoever. Illogical, captain. 

This movie goes wrong, not in its connection to Alien, but with it's attempt to distance itself from the franchise.  It desperately introduces all sorts of random, biotech aliens which are no where near as creepy and vicerally repulsive as H.R. Giger's aesthetic provided.  There are also too many script problems, and nonsensical character motivations.  Why the heck would the two scientists who were scared shitless in a previous scene, all of a sudden want to pet the space cobra?  Why would you take your helmet off on an alien planet, when any number of bad things (the least of which would be an unbreathable atmosphere) could infect, poison, or spectacularly eviscerate you. After everyone on board has been violently killed, and even after the Engineer alien tries to kill Shaw (repeatedly), she immediately wants to go after them - on their home planet?  Really?  I don't buy it. I find that to be an insulting ploy to string us along for sequels, and it was one of the many movie moments that felt completely disingenuous.  

At one point the movie becomes John Carpenter's The Thing, and anything that comes in contact with the oozy space puke (i.e. mealworms, mediocre actors, etc.) turns into a belligerent asshole of a beast.  Just beating up and killing everything in their path.  Why?  I couldn't tell you.  It seemed perfectly obvious that the Xenomorph from the original Alien was such a dickface, because it was always so dang hangry (hungry + angry)... And humans indubitably look like a bunch of bacon cheeseburgers to a hangry xenomorph.  It stands to reason that it had to consume the Nostromo crew in order to have grown 10 feet tall in the 12 or so movie hours that it lurked upon the ship.  Fair attempt at space logic there, captain! 

I think the only reason why I keep watching Prometheus over and over (not through any illegal means, I assure you) is because it gives me that methadone equivalent to Alien's heroine. It's bits and pieces of something that I wanted for a long time, and if I keep going over those bits, I'll some how feel better.  But sadly, it hasn't been working. I still feel that the movie goes off in all sorts of misguided directions, throws in a few red herrings, and leaves me wanting less. 

It appears that being clever with the script has gone by the wayside when it comes to making a sci-fi space horror flick these days.  I love Ridley Scott's epic, visionary films, and Alien shall forever remain untouched as a singular moment in cinema. Prometheus was a bit too Hollywood, with a syrupy score and ideas too big for its britches. Perhaps the last 33 years wasn't a long enough period for Scott to find a better screenplay to work with.

Signs, Signs, Everywhere a Sign...

Tesla -- Not the rock group, but the man.  The myth. He was one of history's greatest inventors, but has faded into obscurity and cult status.  When people think of the light bulb, they think of Edison.  People don't realize that the method used to power that lightbulb today, and every other modern piece of electronic technology, for that matter, was devised by Nikola Tesla.

Why haven't we seen a movie about this man of extraordinary technological influence and intriguing mythos?  Over 100 years ago Tesla predicted a world integrated and powered by wireless electromagnetism. This is something that we are just getting a handle on today.  (i.e. cell phones, wifi, wireless charging)  

He originally came to America to work under Edison, but when his ideas were rejected, a rivalry was born. Tesla's ideas regarding practical use of electricity prevailed in the end (and persist to this day), but because he wasn't as business savvy as Edison, he ended up poor and raising pigeons. 

I find it a tragic story of someone who clearly saw the future, being thwarted by greed and those in power.  These days, people don't need to have a good idea, they just need to have an idea... and If you're a Kardashian sister, you don't even have a clue!  Though somehow they are on TV every day influencing the next generation and spearheading the extraordinarily irritating vocal fry trend.  It's because they know how to brand.  They can sell their shitty brand to a public that doesn't even know what's best for them.  This is what Edison was good at.  He patented every single widget he could muster, so he could corner the market and edge out the competition.  


If ideas succeeded on the merit of their quality alone, we'd live in a utopian society with endless free energy, flying cars, and Ke$ha would be mopping floors.


It would be great to see a biopic chronicling his life... but Hollywood is as guilty as the investors from 100 years ago who didn't want to take a chance on Tesla's brilliant ideas.  His ideas are more relevant than ever!  I suppose in order to make a movie about his life, I'd have to figure in a few hot babes, a car chase and some vampires. 

New Tattoo

Call me mainstream, call me a sucker, call me a fanboy, but I really dig that new Van Halen song Tattoo.  Maybe it's because I'm in an LA mood and these kick-ass old school rockers smack of some local flavor.

Legendary guitarist, Eddie Van Halen, has the unique and profitable ability to combine musical virtuosity with catchy hooks along with infectious rhythms.  There may be an undeniable formula involved in their rock song alchemy, but it just seems to work so well every single time. 


Most hard rock bands fall into the common trap of shredding for the sake of shredding and completely miss the mark of musicality in their overly technical wank fests.  The concept of "serving the song" is not lost on EVH.  His recorded guitar parts, tasteful chord changes and solos are always well thought out and arranged to raise the interest of a section or increase the excitement of the moment.  He's groovy and flavorful, while periodically reminding the listener of how impossibly skilled he is with every last tap-tap-tap-wiedly.



When it comes to another element of the VH success story, I can only think of three words: David Lee Roth. He brings an increased level of pompousness and attitude, or what I like to call "pompitude" to his role as Van Halen frontman.  It ought to be noted that there is a distinct difference between "Lead Singer" and "Front Man."  I am a stickler when it comes to these terms as I consider a front man to be much more of a performer.


A frontman captivates audiences with his antics and generally carries the show with his personality. DLR fills this role perfectly as he is a complete jackass and the consumate showman.  Whereas a lead singer is generally in a band that carries them (i.e. Van Halen; Gary Cherone Era).

When it comes to DLR's vocals, he brings a campy playfulness to their songs while Eddie truly adds artistic depth to the music.  Think that's a stretch?  Listen to "Tattoo" a few more times and you'll hear that it goes beyond a superficial rock song about some Tramp Stamp Sally, but rather there is a blatant underlying self referential theme about Van Halen's ability to stick around.  These guys have such a long history with AND without each other, and are well aware that they are inextricably linked.

There is a dynamism and duality in the lyric vs the music in "Tattoo" which actually brings out a, dare I say it, significant range of emotion from pride, to humor, to nostalgia, to melancholia.

The music of Van Halen and their iconic imagery is etched in rock history. They remind us of this in the screaming pinched harmonics, blistering runs, swooshing dive bombs and half spoken jackassery in this latest tune in their 40 year old arselal of rock. 

Sci-Fi Boner.

When I saw the preview to Ridley Scott's upcoming flick "Prometheus," I couldn't help but get chills when I saw iconic imagery that was used in his 1979 film classic Alien.  The "derilict spacecraft" that the Nostromo crew first come upon, the alien "space jockey" skull and face hugging type creatures are all evident in the trailer.

Though Scott has strongly resisted characterizing this film as a prequel, I think he is setting out to right some things in the deep space, scifi thriller genre. The Alien franchise, with all of its potential, has gone awry in the last 15 years so it looks like Prometheus is a nice reboot or rebirth of something in the same vein.  Who better to redo than the man who started it all?  That's not really a question.

I'm hoping that this film ends up being what Scott calls a stand alone movie with it's own epic mythology... with obvious links to Alien. :)

Speciale Edition

Looking up into the clear blue sky on this Sunny, 65 degree Los Angeles day, it's easy to forget that Christmas is just 4 days away.  People often don't realize how easy it can be to change someone's life through the simple act of giving.   I am very inspired by the prospect of our limitless potential as human beings (...or as Van Halen would say "Humans Being").  

Reconciling my creativity with productivity, on the other hand, is not so easy.  Ideas come and go most often unrealized.  I'm sure we've all forgotten more of our "million dollar ideas" than we've been motivated it capitalize on... but I digress.

Someone recently told me that expressing oneself through the written word is an essential part of being an artist.  Well here I am, being productive and writing away.  Just a thought or two, on what inspires me to continue moving forward on my path.  The story of how I got my foot in the door readily comes to mind.
Brian Reingold (aka Mr. Speciale [yes, with an "e" at the end]) was the first person to ever give me a job in the movie biz.  He was the Unit Production Manager for the Belladonna Studios production "L.I.E."

Like most everyone these days, I had no job or even a single lead straight out of college.  It also doesn't help when you get your degree in Film Studies.  So within days of graduation, I took it upon myself to walk around Manhattan, and go into a string of production company offices cold, resume in hand.  They would all tell me the same thing; that they weren't hiring right now or that they would put my resume on file.  There seemed to be little or no hope, really.

Then one fateful day I walked into the Belladonna office in Chelsea, Manhattan, I was greeted by a bald, hyperkinetic guy with a thick Buffalo accent.  He introduced himself as Brian, but everyone eventually called him Mr. Speciale.  Within moments of meeting him, he said a word or two about his German film producer with the French name, he went on rapid fire style, about his son's major league baseball ambitions, then quickly changed gears again and offered me a gig on the spot despite my lack of experience working on a film set.  I sat there in an illustrated state of dumbfounded excitement.

I distinctly remember the 1st Assistant Director, Jose Gilberto Molinari-Rosaly, coming over and glaring at me, with a "Who the hell is this?  What the hell is he doing here?  Get him the hell out of here! I don't want him to be on my production staff!" look on his face.

After a few tense moments between the two of them as they argued right in front of me over whether or not I should be hired, I butted in and let them know that I could ask a bunch of my former classmates to help out if they needed any more production assistants. I got the job, much to the chagrin of the 1st AD and through much situational massaging on the part of Mr. Speciale.  I also happen to supply the film with 5 other PAs.

Me and my fellow alumni busted our asses working on that movie, and after the first week Jose ate his words.  He actually congratulated all of the PAs and told us we were the best team he had ever worked with!

Why recount this story?  Well, I'm glad I asked!  Because I am inspired by one's willingness to take a chance on someone unproven, solely based on their first impression.  These days it's damn near impossible to find a job without knowing someone first.  It's not what you know, It's not even WHO you know, but rather who knows YOU.  It's true... look it up.

Mr. Speciale hooked me up, got my foot in the door and helped me get other tv/film jobs etc. For that I am eternally thankful. Everyone should be so lucky to have someone randomly help them out like that. Pay it forward in this season of giving.

Merry Christmas Everyone! :)

Cars Parked in the Sun

My LA experience has been nothing short of phenomenal.  I've had an unbelievable reception from the greatest of welcome wagons.  Friends, new and old have been incredibly accommodating and want nothing more than to help out in any way they can.  Though it has its detractors, LA is truly an inspiring city.  A lot of people would sooner gag on a spoon from hearing me say that, so to them I say, "bon appetit."

It's a whole different scene out here versus Long Island, New York.  My general experience here has been that people just want to help you out.  Everyone is here to work, to get jobs and to give jobs.  However, one always has to factor in the LA "flake" quotient.  Being from New York, I tend to say what I mean and do what I say I'm going to do.  If we agree to meet or do something, I'll hold you to it.  People in LA ... not so much. 

It's been about a month and a half since I arrived in this sunny city of Angelenos, and I've discovered that the music scene here is alive and well.  I've seen many local bands including Shadow Shadow Shade, Telstar, and most recently The Child.  I make it a habit to go out just about every night, just to see what's crackin'.

The Child was quite impressive with their spacey David Bowie-esque sounds and atmosphere.      They had an eclectic look, solid rhythm section and you can't beat a band that has 2 chick singers.  It was their EP release party, and it was a lot of fun to watch. 

At this show I ran into Dhani Harrison (Son of George), and had a bit of a chat with him.  I was quite impressed with Dhani's words and wisdom, having recently seen him in the Scorcese documentary "Living in the Material World," about his father.  The son of the famed "quiet" Beatle was exceedingly nice and was somehow convinced that he had met me before.  He was sure that I was one of two Aristotles that he knows and that I was the one he had met while hanging out with Zowie Bowie.  I insisted he was mistaken, though in retrospect, I should have just went along with it.

Some Things I Can't Remember

The mind is like a dryer... every now and then you lose a sock full of memories.  I sometimes think about the line in the 40 Year Old Virgin, when Steve Carell is hammered and when asked how much he's had to drink says "Oh, how many times have you gone to the bathroom in your life?!" There's really no way to tell.

I was pouring my cereal in a bowl this morning thinking about how 10 years from now, I will have absolutely no recollection of this minor event, unless a big brown bear smashed through the wall at that very moment.  If that were to happen, I would inevitably recount that story by saying how I was just minding my own business, pouring a bowl of cereal and all of a sudden... etc. etc. etc.


It also happens to be laundry day.  We really don't remember these moments in between.  My meaningless cereal pouring on the morning of December 8th 2012; the 22nd anniversary of the death of John Lennon; the date that Dimebag Darell was shot to death on a stage in Ohio;  My sister's birthday.  All of these events are effortlessly etched in the forefront of my mind on this date... but my cereal and laundry will be lost.


I often think about how we never really see the actual events of someone's life in TV or Film.  The hit show "24" boasted that every hour was in "real time" but I don't remember the episode where Jack Bauer was gone for 10-15 minutes because he was in the bathroom.  I figure that could be a whole segment, between commercials.  Everyone standing around, looking at their watches, waiting for Jack to shit or get off the pot. 


Goodbye my Rice Crispies, you were my arbitrary choice of morning sustenance.  The event of my pouring you, dousing you with milk and your consumption shall forever be forgotten... unless I write a blog about it.